Darcy the Dragon

With October behind us I've been cranking the Christmas tunes pretty consistently ever since. Along the way I've come across the classic "Darcy the Dragon" by Roger Whittaker. The lyrics are these:

Roger Whittaker - Darcy The Dragon

Christmas was coming, and Darcy the dragon
Was thinking what he should do
Go through the forest and into the village
To pick up a gift or two.
For through the forest dear Darcy had friends
Whom he loved very much
He thought it'd be fine, at Christmas-time,
To give each a present or such.

But Darcy'd forgotten the very thing
That makes a dragon unique.
Unlike a horse, a dragon, of course,
Breathes fire whenever he speaks.
Off to town dear Darcy went,
But woe is me, oh lament,
Before a dragon penny was spent
He'd started a tiny fire.

He said he was sorry, our Darcy did,
He helped put the fire out.
The folks forgave him for he'd been kind,
and off he went looking about.
Into the toyshop did Darcy go, with thoughts of his forest friends.
I'll buy each a gift, he said with a flame and the second fire, it was then.

This time, when the fire was out,
The villagers charged along
Pursuing Darcy with angry shouts:
'Be off! Away! Be gone!'
Poor Darcy spoke,'No harm I meant!'
But from the village he was sent.
And woe is me and oh lament,
No presents for his friends!

As Darcy let out with a dragon cry,
He opened his mouth so wide
That the wind and snow blew right down his throat
And put out the fire inside!
When Darcy realized the fire was out,
First a whisper, then a SHOUT!
And a laugh to know he could speak without
Starting another fire!

Now it was late on a Christmas eve.
He was up, and off with a roar!
He raced to the village and he cried out,
'My fire! he am no more!'
From shop to shop he then did go.
In each he made his choice.
Darcy was treated so kindly now,
No need to fear his voice!

The villagers came to the edge of town,
And Darcy waved good-bye.
'Come back again, if ever you can!'
They said, and he said that he'd try,
Merry Christmas all did say as to the woods
he made his way
tomorrow will be Christmas Day and a Merry Christmas to thee!
--------------------

So basically a dragon is Christmas shopping in a village when he is expelled for starting fires, which is at least somewhat understandable. In a culture wherein talking dragons who conduct commerce are the norm, however, you'd think there'd be a little more awareness regarding the biological realities of the species.

So anyway, he leaves and then swallows a lot of snow and it 'put the fire out,' apparently forever, which is too bad. It would be like a human eating a snow cone and then becoming permanently blinded.

But this qualifies him to return to the village, where the villagers cheerfully welcome him and the money he's infusing into their economy for all the presents for his Christmas Village dragon friends. He's also kind of a 'special' dragon, too, what with the 'my fire, he am no more!' comment.

This isn't really a happy song with a good lesson, is it? At the very least you'd think in the typical narrative that Whittaker could have had a glacier hit the town and Darcy uses his unique talent to thaw everyone, thereby teaching the world about forgiveness and brotherly love and so on. I think I am offically jaded.