Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Further proof America is the greatest couuntry on Earth

Friday, March 19, 2010

My plan to save America

I know everyone's really nervous/worried about the healthcare vote this weekend, but I think I've found a way to ensure that the vote gets derailed and everything goes back to normal. This is a very carefully thought out idea, so pay close attention as I'll need everyone's help to make this happen.

Step 1: Hire Steve Perry from Journey
Step 2: Fly him to Washington DC and put him on a tour of the US Senate/Congress building
Step 3: Have him wait until Sunday
Step 4: This is where it gets more complicated. Steve Perry needs to be in place on some stairs. When all the congressmen are assembled to have the final discussions, and everyone's yelling at each other and everything's really really crazy, give Steve Perry a microphone and turn it up really loud. Right as things are their loudest, Steve will sing "YOU SHOULD'DA BEEN GONE!"

Everyone will stop talking and will look around. He'll continue: "Knowing how I made you feel, and YOU SHOULD'DA BEEN GONE!" He'll go on to sing the rest of "Oh Sherrie" and all the congress people will look at each other and they'll decide it's better to sing Steve Perry songs than ruin everyone's health care, and soon they'll all be singing "Oh Sherrie."

Problem solved.