Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Movie review: The Hobbit


(SPOILERS BELOW)

We saw The Hobbit the other day. It was OK. Normally I would summarize the plot but I think everyone is pretty familiar with it. Quickly, it's just a prequel to the Lord of the Rings movies in which Bilbo meets Gandalf and goes on an adventure with 12 dwarves to try to re-claim their mountain kingdom from a dragon that invaded it and is hoarding all their gold.

Along the way they sing songs, banter, spend a great deal of time exploring the very scary and dark back-story of "Thorin Oakenshield," the dwarf prince guy that is leading them, and they run into trolls and Gollum and other people.

What I liked:
1. Very good acting and casting, especially with Martin Freeman as Bilbo.
2. Great production values. The sets and scenery and places they go are all very cool and creative.
3. Decent special effects. Gollum in particular looks excellent.
4. Elrond Hubbard was much more active this time. He rode a horse and had a personality. Much better than in LOTR where he just stood there in his silky jammies and talked slowly.
5. Good music.
6. It looks like it would have been good in 3D.

What I didn't like:
1. They shouldn't have gone with the whole 'white orc' storyline thing. It was irrelevant to the Hobbit and was dark and violent and really ruined the tone of the film. It was supposed to be this lighthearted heist adventure film and instead was all about decapitations and scary monsters.
2. What was the point of the meeting at Rivendell? It just slowed the movie down and made it just seem like an imitation of LOTR 1.
3. Too much CGI.
4. Why did Smaug want the gold? He's a dragon. What's he going to spend it on? Some pants?
5.  Not enough Bilbo.
6. 'What's in my pocket' is not a riddle. It's a totally unfair question. That's like saying 'what color are the new underpants I bought in 1987' or 'what's my favorite breakfast cereal.' By definition, this question clearly shouldn't have counted.
7. It's ridiculous that anyone could hang on to the knees of a giant stone monster when he's fighting other giant stone monsters. You would fall off.
8. Gandalf helps too much. He saves everyone from everything. No one has to use any ingenuity (although Bilbo did a little bit in the part with the trolls). They just have to wait for Gandalf to get there.
9. What lesson did we learn? Not to underestimate Hobbits. That's about it.
10. What was in it for Gandalf? He never really says. Does he want the money or something? I couldn't figure out why he was along for all of this.

I heard they're going to wrap up the Smaug stuff in the next film and then have a 'giant battle' for the 3rd film. Ug. Do we really want to see another giant Lord of the Rings battle? That was the entire 2nd and 3rd LOTR movies. We've already been there. Let's do something else. Like end on the 2nd movie...

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