Those of you who know me know that I hate things that never happened or were never said. Ask me sometime about that Footprints poem that everyone loves, or the quote attributed to Christ that says "I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it."
Recently, I've been cranking the Christmas tunes and have noticed the song I've taken for granted all my life, "Little Drummer Boy," is a work of pure fantasy. Nowhere in the book of Luke does it state, amongst the newborn Christ Child and the visitation of the magi, a lame little drummer boy who favored our Lord and Savior with a jazzy drum solo.
What's more, the song states "The Ox and Lamb kept time, pa-rum-pa-pah-pum." First of all, that's ridiculous. The ox and lamb didn't join in the song, which didn't happen in the first place. Second of all, the little drummer boy himself would keep time, being, you know, the DRUMMER and everything. He has no need of anyone to 'keep time' for him, because it's HIS job to keep time!
So now we have a fictional boy playing a drum solo, and livestock kicking in to this mixed-species band that has the most complete rhythm section of anyone in the world. Who are they-Primus? Are the camels gonna bust out the bass guitar next?
Finally, you're Mary, you've just given birth in a manger. Your baby is tired, it's late, it's been a big night. Some little boy shows up and wants to PLAY THE DRUMS? There's no way. Joseph would have hurled the drum over the fence with his little shepherd crook thing.
I hate things that never happened!
9 comments:
Thank you for filling this request. I think I should receive Evil Robot Reader of the Week because you didn't have to draw anything new for this post.
I think this is my favorite one of all time.
Now, I would like to know just how anyone knows exactly who was or wasn't there and what did or didn't happened? I'm just saying, who knows for sure, right? Anything is a possibility
I understand about hating what isn't there. But nowhere does it say either that there were magi in the manger at the time of Christ's birth.
Read Matthew 2. They came nearly two years later!
Was you there ?
Did you FOLLOW THE STAR?
I PLAYYY MY HORN VERY WELLLLLLL TODAY! 🎵🎵 PAAAAAARUMMMMMMPAAAAAAPUMMMMMPUMMMMMM AND I DID PLAY A DRUM A LITTLE BOY SWELLLLL! THE LORD DID SAY I WOULD SURELY COME! PLAYING A DRUMMMMM 📱 🎵🎶 🥁 📯 WIOAOAOAOAOAOAOA! OHHHHHHHHHH GREAT EAGLE DID YOU SEEE ?????? THE OX AND LAMB THEY DID LAY AND SEEEE, FOR THE LORD WITH THEM WAS THE NEWBORNNNNNN PRINCE OF PEACE!
🦅⚔️📖🕯️❤️🔥📖🚪📯📡🛰️ 🗝️ DOOR 🫴🚪 open.
Hahahahahaha wioaoaoaoaooaoaoa 📯 📡🛰️ 🌈👑📖
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